We received about 16 inches of snow this week. So…
 
8:00 am: I made a snowman.

 
8:10 – A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snowwoman.
 
8:15 – So, I made a snowwoman.
 
8:17 – My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman’s voluptuous chest, saying it objectified women everywhere.

 
8:20 – The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it should have been two snowmen instead.
 
8:22 – The transgender man / woman / person asked why I didn’t just make one snow person with detachable parts.
 
8:25 – The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and are not to be used to decorate snow figures.
 
8:28 – I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
 
8:30 – I used food coloring to make one of the snow couple a different color and be more racially inclusive.
 
8:37 – Then I was accused of using a blackface on the snowperson.
 
8:39 – The Middle Eastern gent across the road demanded that the snow woman be completely covered.
 
8:40 – The police arrived saying someone had been offended.
 
8:42 – The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.
 
8:43 – The ‘council on equality’ officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

 
8:45 – A TV news crew showed up. I was asked if I knew the difference between snowmen and snowwomen. I replied “snowballs” and am now a sexist.
 
9:00 – I was on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, and sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
 
9:10 – I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were then taken by social services.
 
9:29 – Far-left protesters, offended by everything, marched down the street, demanding that I be arrested.

 
9:45 – The boss called and fired me because of the negative association with work that had been all over social media
 
10:00 – I cry into my drink because all I wanted to do was build a snowman….

 Moral: There is no moral to this story. This is what this world has become because of a bunch of snowflakes.

☆☆☆☆☆

IN GOD WE TRUST

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CINDY LEAL MASSEY, TEXAS AUTHOR

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