In June 2022, down in Texas, a Mexican-born Republican Hispanic woman, Mayra Flores, won a special election to replace a Democrat who retired early. It’s becoming more common.
Many Hispanic Texans firmly believe Democrats stole the 2020 election from President Donald Trump. After all, one of the most surprising outcomes that defend this thought was the very high Hispanic support nationwide for Trump.
This historic political phenomenon is in spite of mainstream media mockingbirding the Democrat Party playbook narratives: “Trump is racist, his immigration policy expanded holding children in cages and separating them from parents.”
Especially on the southern Texas border, Mexican-Americans know the truth. They lived the horrors of the Obama-Biden-Pelosi immigration strategies. It is not the propaganda version portrayed in media. They see through the lies. By now, all Americans should understand this.
HUMOR UNITES US
“Have a joke and a smile…” my childhood friend Rene says as we bump fists and laugh at the world.
“…in perfect harmony,” I respond with a grin.
Having grown up in south San Antonio, Dodie and I were blessed to be immersed in the Mexican culture. Through the years, our friends and relatives have shared a smart sense of humor, knowing it helps us build resilience to stress and improve our overall physical and emotional health.
Humor bonds us. We look at things in a different way than what’s being spoon-fed by media and indoctrination. It is what keeps our relationships strong. It unites.
With the stolen 2020 election and politics rapidly going even more dangerously corrupt, one of the more passionate trends shared is THE MEXICAN WORD OF THE DAY memes and jokes.
These are far more than just jokes. Many use them as a coping mechanism. Yes, it bonds and unites our blended cultures.
While President Donald J. Trump was in office and things were going well for farmers and ranchers, legendary calf roper Tex Kent decided it was finally time for a new truck.
The 20-year-old truck he had patched and repaired for the past 10 years was so well used that his sweet wife finally refused to ride in it with him to town. Since it had been some time since he had bought a truck, the rancher contacted a friend, of a friend, of a friend that worked at a big city dealership.
Kent called the truck dealer to find out he could get a basic new truck for around $30,000. He deciphered his return on investment and payment amounts with his banker and decided he would drive in to the city the next week to select a new pickup that his sweet wife would be proud to ride in.
Kent arrived at the dealership to meet the salesman that was refered to him by his friends’, friend’s, friend.
“So what type of truck do you need?” the dealer asked as he shook his hand.
Kent replied, “Just a basic ranch truck, nothing too fancy.”
The salesman then started asking some questions, “Do you need four-wheel-drive? Do you need a 3/4 ton truck to pull your trailer? Do you want an automatic transmission? Do you want air-conditioning? Do you need a towing package and a grill guard? Do you want oversized trailer mirrors? Do you need a tool-box for your tools? Do you need floor mats for your muddy feet? Do you want a king-cab so you can keep your records, receipts, and coat clean and dry?
Kent pulled out his red bandana, wiped his brow, then blowed his nose and interrupted, “Sir these are all things a rancher needs on a basic ranch work truck!‘
The salesman replied, “Well they may be standard to you, but they aren’t to Ford Motor Company.”
Their discussion about what was needed on a basic ranch truck went on for several more minutes and finally the salesman said, “I have three trucks on the lot that are just what you need. Do you want a white one, a blue one, or a brown one?”
Cowboy Kent replied, “I don’t really care that much, but I don’t think I want brown, and the white one will show all of the mud and dirt, so I will go with the red one.”
The salesman said, “Ok Let’s take it for a test drive.”
While out on the test drive the salesman said, “You know I would really like to have 10 or 12 cows myself. What does a basic cow sell for these days?’
Kent scratched his head and replied well cows are sort of like trucks, an average cow, or the basic model as you might call them, sells for around $1,000.”
Kent really enjoyed the test drive and the visit with his new acquaintance. Everything was fine until they got back to the dealership to fill out the paperwork. He started signing sheet after sheet and finally asked, “So what is the total cost of this truck?
The sales man replied, “$44,860”
“What?” Kent pulled out his bandana again, wiped his brow but didn’t bother with his nose, “I thought the basic truck sold for around $30,000?”
The salesman replied, “Well we added considerable extras to the basic model, 4×4, automatic transmission, air-conditioning, 3/4 ton suspension, heavy-duty breaks and cooling, extra-large mirrors, toolbox, heavy duty towing package, and floor mats.”
Well, Kent was not at all happy. He felt that he had been mislead, but he had already invested a day, really liked the truck, and wanted to please his wife, so he bought it.
About a year later, after Biden had swindled his way into office and the price of gas, ranching, and food had skyrocketed, the salesman called Kent up to see how he liked his truck, and then asked if he had any cows for sale?
Kent pulled his MAGA cap off, wiped his brow and got a twinkle in his eye. It was payback time. He replied, “Sure I have some cows for sale. Come take a look at them later this week.”
The salesman really enjoyed riding through the pasture with Kent in his nice truck looking at various cows. He was as tickled as he had finally saved up enough to live out his childhood dream of being a real cowboy. He told Kent, “I’ll take 10 of them!”
Kent, had noticed the car dealer was wearing a blue “Build Back Better” cap and figured this city slicker was a Democrat. He looked the liberal in the eye and said,”Ok that will be $44,860!”
The salesman said, “What? I thought that cows sold for $1,000?”
Kent replied, “That was for the basic model, these cows come with considerable extras!” And he handed the salesman the following sheet that he had his sweet wife make up the night before on their home computer:
Basic Cow with Options
🔹Basic cow $999
🔹Shipping and handling $85
🔹Self-propelled, auto-steer forage finder $969
🔹Extra-large capacity stomach $379
🔹Genuine cowhide upholstery $179
🔹Two tone exterior $142
🔹Heavy duty forage choppers $189
🔹Four spigot/high-output milk system $159
🔹Automatic fly-swatter $88
🔹Automatic fertilizer attachment $139
🔹4 x 4 traction drive assembly $884
🔹Ranch brand leather-work $69
🔹Rancher’s Suggested List Price $4,286
🔹Ownership Transfer fee: $200
Total Price: (Including options)$4,486
“For ten basic cows,” Kent smiles. “That adds up to $44,860.”
The True Story of the Profound Lesson I Learned in 1963 on a Barber’s Chair
Just eight miles south-southwest of where I thought John Wayne fought at the Alamo was a spot in San Antonio where serious thinking and deciphering came into my life.
Slightly west of the halfway point along the street I saw President Kennedy on the day before his assassination–between the San Jose Mission and Kelly Air Force Base–is a region where my father was considered “patron.”
Starting on the Southeast corner of Southwest Military Drive, and heading south for eleven blocks on Commercial Street, was the first of five business pillars of our community.
Three proprietors were the foundation of commerce on Commercial Avenue and gaining the kind of momentum two others, Joe Barry and Mr. Stacey had held for a number of years.
The first was Raymond “Bud” Jones of the “Meal A Minute” 89 cent All-You-Can-Eat -Fish fame. Bud, who passed away in October 2018, opened his legendary restaurant in 1959 at the Military Drive/Commercial southeast corner. Today, this South Side institution still serves the All-You-Can-Eat-Fish for $9.75 with his daughter Cathy and family running it.
Joe Barry owned the Terrell Wells grocery and gas store that eventually became the original VFW Post 8541. My daddy, Walter “Corky” Dennis, would go in to buy a pack of Camels (later on, he graduated to Salem’s) as I would sit in the car and look at the screen on a front door. It was painted yellow and blue with a gingham dressed girl smiling with bread in her hands proclaiming that we should “Reach for Sunbeam Bread.”
Mercy, did I have a crush on that pretty blond haired-blue eyed beauty! I wondered often if she was kin to Dorothy of Kansas and Toto fame. Perhaps a blond cousin?
Later on, when I became at least as good at ‘cipherin’ as Jethro Bodine, I figured her out. I deduced she was the older sister of another girl and her dog– the little tan one on Coppertone signs who was embarrassed about having her panties almost torn off.
Across the street from Terrell Wells Grocery was Stacey’s Barber Shop. With a prominent barber pole on the south front lawn, Mr. and Mrs. Stacey lived on the north half of their shop in a small white wood framed house.
It was a matter of honor, but mostly courage, to sit up high on the board placed on the white arms of the barber chair of Mr. Stacey. I proudly received my trims from the same man who had cut my great grandfather John’s, grandpa Jack’s and father Corky’s hair.
I liked to go there with Daddy. But Mom, not so much. Momma would always make me sit close to the front door as we walked in. It just did not seem quite right for a girl like Momma, to be in a barber shop. There was nothing really wrong with it. Other mothers and even Mrs. Stacey came in. But a guy could not really appreciate the “feel” of the place with women in there.
There seemed to be more laughter and the men could talk about men’s things like “baseball,” or “a missile crisis” when the women were away.
In early December, Dad took me in. Grandpa Dennis was in one of the waiting chairs at the far right end facing the barber chairs on the left.
Without Momma around I could penetrate farther in and get away from the front door where the Porky Pig, Zorro or Superman books were. Sitting between Daddy and Grandpa I could scan the cover of nearby True Detective magazines. Mr. and Mrs. Stacey would never allow anything more manly than that. But to a guy just about to turn eight, True Detective was very mannish. (Note: The word “Macho” had not been invented yet as far as I know).
As each customer walked in, they were passed an 8 x 10 black and white glossy of what was purported to be the “last picture of JFK before he was shot.” One of the barbers had bought it for a dollar at the drug store located next to St. Leo’s Church on South Flores Street during their 1963 Fall Festival and Tamale Sale. Dad let me look at it and I felt important.
“Okay, Jack, you are next,” said one of the barbers. He was talking to Grandpa, who got up and sat down in a man’s size barber’s chair.
I did not notice who just walked in. I was determining if Daddy would let me go next, after Grandpa, instead of him. If so, Mr. Stacey would cut my hair. Then my odds for getting a sucker were better. Some of the other barbers did not always remember to pass out the suckers. Mr. Stacey never forgot, plus he would let me choose the color. I would leave the yellows or browns for the poor kids that were stuck with the other barbers.
Richard Floyd, my step grandfather sat down beside me grinning.
“Paw Paw,” I grinned back. We hugged.
Paw Paw was a tall human being. With only one good eye and a few good teeth, he was not much for the world to see, but to me he walked on water.
“What are you doing, gettin’ your ears lowered, Booger?” He waved his hand from front to back over his head.
“They only charge Paw Paw half price, because I only have half my hair.”
What a treat it was to have two grandfathers and a father in the same barber shop all at the same time.
“Are you ready for your birthday?” Paw Paw asked.
When Grandpa Dennis heard that, he called me up and reached in his wallet. He handed me a dollar bill.
“Grandpa didn’t forget your birthday,” he said. “You tell your daddy to get you something with this.”
Paw Paw saw what was going on and he pulled TWO dollars out of his billfold and handed it to me with Happy Birthday instructions to tell my Mom to get me something with them.
Three whole dollars in a matter of seconds and it was the most money I had up to that point in my life. (Note: That amount in 1963 is worth $25.36 today).
When I sat back down, secretly enjoying the $3 in my pocket, my mind immediately jumped to disenchantment. Suddenly, my brain realized what people meant when they said “bad luck or trouble comes in threes.” And it had nothing to do with the money.
I had been waiting for the third calamity to reveal itself ever since my beloved cockerspaniel Blackie died on November 4th and John F. Kennedy on the 22nd. Within a little over a month’s time, there I was, in the middle of the prohibited end of the barber shop and suddenly going through trauma numero tres!
It was at this moment I discovered that BOTH of my grandfathers had three fingers missing from their left hands.
What was this? Why hadn’t I really noticed their left hands before? Or maybe I did, but it did not register until I saw them both in the same room. Or was it because I was almost eight and noticing more adult things? After all, I had just scanned the covers of two True Detectives.
For at least the next few weeks I was terrified of everything my hands touched. Perhaps this was some kind of omen or family curse? What were the odds? Two grandfathers with the same hands missing three fingers!
Just in time for Christmas, Daddy explained that Paw Paw was only my step-grandfather, so it really did not count—-there was no family curse.
“You do not have to worry about it any more.”
Thank God for Daddy’s explanation. I didn’t know how much longer I could have held out keeping my left hand in my pocket everywhere I went. Each morning when I awoke, I would look to see if those fingers on that hand were still there. Somehow it would sneak out from under the pillow during my sleep.
Definitely, I would not dare do what the other boys were inventing in the cafeteria. By placing a pencil on top of their middle finger and bending the adjacent fingers over the pencil, they could “shoot the bird.”
Not quite understanding what that meant, as far as I was concerned if I shot that bird it was sure to be a recipe for the family curse. I knew that bird had wings for a reason. Around me it was going to just have to fly away. I did not intend to lose my three fingers over a bird.
Hunter Biden’s daddy, the “Big Guy,” has a history of cheating. Through plagiarism in college, back door deals in New Jersey, voter and ballot fraud, money laundering kick backs with foreign entities, Joe Biden has always been a low class political swindler.
Here’s a satirical look at Biden and his pals as seen through the eyes of millions via social media memes.
The character, Jim Halpert, is played by John Krasinki from America’s television comedy sitcom, The Office. In his now popular meme, Jim points to a whiteboard and then smiles.
On November 10th, 2008, the episode of The Office entitled “Baby Shower” Jim charts how his boss Michael might be related to another character’s baby.
He says, “Jan is about to have a baby with a sperm donor. And Michael is preparing for the birth of a watermelon with Dwight. Now, this baby will be related to Michael through delusion.”
On March 16th, 2016, Tumblr account the-office-daily posted a two-panel screenshot from the scene. The post received more than 3,700 notes in less than four years
On April 17th, 2016, Buzzfeed used an edited version of the image that reads “How compatible with Jim Halpert are you?”
Several years later, on August 27th, 2019, Imgur user fluffypancakes shared an edited variation that reads “Government is necessary because people left unchecked will do evil. The government is composed of people left unchecked.”
The post received more than 114,000 views and 4,400 points in less than one year.
Here are some of the top rated Whiteboard Lesson Guy’s memes:
We passed up going to WonderWorks in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee and I instantly regretted it after we left.
Driving away toward the Great Smokies National Park, I suddenly remembered a Facebook post from a friend, Janie Buys, a few years ago mentioning the attraction. It seems she had doubts about visiting it with husband Phil and son Phil Jr., but after she went in, it didn’t take her long to enjoy it.
A couple of weeks later into our month long roadtrip, Dodie and I were pleasantly surprised to see a WonderWorks in Branson, Missouri.
Dodie, a retired nurse, has always enjoyed science and the attraction bills itself as “a science focused indoor amusement park, combines education and entertainment. With over 100 hands-on exhibits – there is something unique and challenging for all ages.”
The building is enticing enough to spur anyone’s interest. It looks like a giant four story venue turned upside down. As soon as we walked in, the floor was the ceiling and the ceiling was the floor.
It was fun to experience the power of 84mph hurricane–force winds in the Hurricane Shack. Some chose to make huge, life–sized bubbles in the Bubble Lab.
I enjoyed the NASA Space area but we elected not to get strapped into the Astronaut Training Gyro to “experience zero gravity.” We also passed lying on the death–defying Bed of Nails.
Here’s the Top 10 Things I Learned at WonderWorks:
1. You can’t see your ears without a mirror.
2. You can’t count your hair.
3. You can’t breath through your nose with your tounge out.
4. You just tried No. 3.
6. When you tried No. 3 you realized that it is possible, but you looked like a dog.
7. You are smiling right now, because you were fooled.
8. You skipped No. 5.
9. You just checked to see if there is a No. 5.
10. Share this with your friends so they can have fun too.
Television’s Impractical Jokers member Joe Gatto posted the surprising news on Instagram before the New Year 2022 rang in that he would “create new ways to entertain you.”
“Sorry in advance for the long and more-serious-than-usual note below, I just wanted to let you all know that I will no longer be involved with Impractical Jokers,” Gatto wrote. “Alongside my friends, I’ve devoted a decade of my life to building this franchise and couldn’t be prouder of what has been accomplished. However, due to some issues in my personal life, I have to step away. Bessy and I have decided to amicably part ways, so now I need to focus on being the best father and co-parent to our two incredible kids.
“Outside of my family, my relationships with Murr, Q and Sal have been the most important in my life,” he continued. “I know they will continue to make the world laugh. And even though the four of us are the ones who you all see, this show is only possible due to the hard work of the talented crew members who work behind the scenes. I am very thankful to have worked with each and every one of them.”
How Gatto’s exit affects the future of the troupe is unknown. The stars of the long-running TruTV series struck a first-look deal with WarnerMedia earlier in 2021 and had their flagship show renewed for a tenth season.
The Tenderloins comedy troupe, which includes Gatto, James “Murr” Murray, Brian “Q” Quinn and Sal Vulcano, were slated to develop and produce original unscripted and scripted programming for TNT, TBS and truTV as well as HBO Max.
The also star in Impractical Jokers: Dinner Party, launched Impractical Jokers: The Movie in 2020 and are making Impractical Jokers: After Party with Joey Fatone.
They are also involved in The Misery Index, which is in its third season at TBS.